My friend Beth mentioned that she was thinking about volunteering for Glad.ney adoption. This sounded like a good idea to me. I have been feeling lately that I am too self involved. I even forgot my step mom's birthday. All I seem to think about is my own pain and suffering. I really need to get out of myself and do something worth while.
So today I went to the Glad.ney adoption website and started looking around. I decided to sign up to get the free adoption info. That was a mistake. I have heard that they are one of more expensive adoption centers, but still are they serious with these amounts?
Income Adoption Fee
Less than $75,000 $25,700
$75,001-$100,000 $28,700
$100,001-$150,000 $34,700
$150,001-$200,000 $40,700
$200,001 plus $42,700
So for a couple who makes less than $75, 000 they have to spend 1/3 of their income on adoption. How do people do that? I know that 1/3 of my income goes to paying bills. I could also do 3 IVF cycles for 25, 000.
It just makes me sad that any drug addict can have a baby. But a women who would be wonderful mother can't have children because her body is screwed up and she's not rich. It just doesn't seem fair.
5 comments:
Hey - happy late birthday...
I have to give you props on this blog - my boss just adopted a little girl from China and it was upwards of $25K...she would adopt 10 more if she could afford it (and if her husband would let her). It is frusterating that there are children in this world needing good homes and people willing to give them good homes - but can't afford to make it happen. I just don't understand this world.
Call me sometime - I'd really like to get together and chat if you are up to it. Peace and Blessings!
Adoptions agencies PLAN for the fact that you get an IRS deduction of up to $10,000 for adoption expenses (in the year you actually spend them). You can look back and see that, historically, adoption fees were about $10,000 less until the government granted the deduction. It's shameful, really, the way they have done it...and there is no one to hold them accountable.
I have had a hard time swallowing this post...it's taken me a few hours to find the words I feel compelled to say...
While I can't even begin to imagine the pain, frustration, hurt and sadness that you have felt, it really hurt my heart when you vented your frustrations about "Any drug addicts can have babies" and why people that would be wonderful mothers can't have them. Well, as an adopted child myself - I'm glad that my drug addict birth mother WAS a good enough mother to make a good choice during a time in her life that was probably full of chaos. Mothers come in all different shapes in forms, some you are blood related to, some that you are not. I couldn't be any more alike than my adoptive mother, but that doesn't make me any less grateful to the lady who gave of herself for 9 months instead of ridding herself of me.
If it were up to me, I would keep it as difficult to adopt babies because I would want to make sure that if I were the one entrusting my child with someone else...that they would do ANYTHING on this earth to take care of the baby since I wasn't capable. I know my parents wanted me more than most others, and I have the adoption papers to prove it.
I hope that you can find peace and that God will finally bless you and your husband with a happy and healthy child - in whatever way it's meant to be. Just don't be angry at those who make different choices because those choices may come and benefit you down the road!
Anonymous simpy read your blog wrong...maybe its because I know you and your heart that I completely understood what you were saying about "drug addicts". There was no malice and no ill feelings towards those who chose to give up their children for adoption. We both know and feel that everything happens for a reason. And if there is a child that is put on this earth to be your adoptive child, then no matter what mother he/she came from, you would praise God and rejoice.
No one can understand your pain and suffering from not being able to conceive and carry your own child. And no one should make you feel guilty for your own feelings and heartache.
I appreciate the love 'A' has for her birth mother, God had an amazing life planned out for her. But it doesn't negate the fact that said mother HAD a baby she couldn't take care. 'A' misread the intent of the blog. Albeit she said it in a very respectable manner.
I guess I just know your heart...and we all aren't the best writers.
What I meant to say but got interrupted by little K...was that we all aren't the best at expressing our feelings and how we truly feel in a written form. That's what was supposed to be written!!hahaha!
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